Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
