I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
