Sry I called you an 8
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
