That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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