I cockslap morals
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
They have beer where we have blood.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
