have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Randomize
