i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
