garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
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