Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize
