in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
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