is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Randomize
