Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.

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  (586): matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet. http://tfl.nu/32zr
  Replies (19) Good night (1261) Bad night (1261)
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  (212): View more from New York

  yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?

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  (212): yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT? http://tfl.nu/zjw1
  Replies (28) Good night (705) Bad night (2015)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  pussy has no personality

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Amen to that

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  (609): she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that (484): pussy has no personality (609): Amen to that http://tfl.nu/mkon
  Replies (17) Good night (2882) Bad night (742)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth

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  (847): Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth http://tfl.nu/6ed0
  Replies (29) Good night (4501) Bad night (875)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys

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  (781): They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys http://tfl.nu/3nq8
  Replies (33) Good night (4905) Bad night (856)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.

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  (203): So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off. http://tfl.nu/cdqo
  Replies (10) Good night (5104) Bad night (881)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.

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  (314): So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs. http://tfl.nu/hgyg
  Replies (14) Good night (5296) Bad night (1186)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name

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  (561): Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name http://tfl.nu/36j9
  Replies (4) Good night (3289) Bad night (950)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.

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  (301): If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich. http://tfl.nu/u48k
  Replies (6) Good night (2923) Bad night (1029)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.

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  (770): my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf. http://tfl.nu/iy7m
  Replies (10) Good night (1172) Bad night (4221)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.

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  (301): Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material. http://tfl.nu/ut5k
  Replies (2) Good night (1224) Bad night (1184)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?

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  (403): All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for? http://tfl.nu/dlqr
  Replies (22) Good night (3778) Bad night (652)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.

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  (703): HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER. http://tfl.nu/g3ji
  Replies (1) Good night (1312) Bad night (384)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..

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  (740): I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation.. http://tfl.nu/kwny
  Replies (1) Good night (315) Bad night (661)
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  (660): View more from Missouri

  My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?

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  (660): My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA (816): Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better? http://tfl.nu/yqa7
  Replies (4) Good night (767) Bad night (263)

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