I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize