p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I wish i was in the wii world.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
