Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
