I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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