idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Randomize