i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.