im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
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you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
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