We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
