You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
How's work?
Spinning.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize
