No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
