Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
