How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Randomize
