girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
