Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
