i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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