at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
