the new term for farting is butt boxing.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
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