dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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