You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
