Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
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