Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
