Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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