On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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