Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Randomize
