So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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