Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
