I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
