is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
