If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Randomize
