UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I still have a little drunk in my system
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize