You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
