Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
I feel great
I just peed on a car
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize