GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
