oh god the rape fog is back!
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
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