she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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