She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
My brain says no but my pants say off.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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