Already got asked if we're dating
I wish I could teleport
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
