It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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